Cowen-isms

So, last night was a celebration for my favorite doctor on the planets 75th birthday. We were working together, and out of nowhere, another nurse said, "Dr. Cowen, after 75 years of life and 50 years of marriage, do you have any advice for Christine here?" Now, background information you should know about is that, when you ask a question, Dr. Cowen never gives a quick answer. We have kind of lovingly learned to call these answers, Cowen-isms.

Well, last night I got more than I bargained for. I should also let you know that I had worked late at work Monday night, so I was on about three hours of sleep. Those who don't know me well, I don't function without sleep. I was pretty emotional anyway, but after about an hour of Dr. Cowen describing his life with his wife and his career in medicine I was honestly on the verge of tears.

So, here are a few things I learned. I hope you will find them as moving as I did. Dr. Cowen didn't make plans. He is one of the smartest, most successful men I have had the priviledge of working with, but based on his description of his life, he did not make plans. When Dr. Cowen met his wife, he said he was "immune to girls." He had been burnt by a girl earlier and was over it. (There's hope for me yet!) He was in medical training and still had to finish and do a residency and take boards, and of course, he couldn't think of a woman until he had finished those things! But, he shared, he fell head over heels for this good-looking nurse who always new exactly what he would need, even when he didn't. (Now you see why I love Dr. C?) It is now 50
four children, and eleven grandchildren later. And I doubt if Dr. Cowen regrets deviating from his plan.

Next, from this converstation, I learned the value of a life lived with dignity. I think this is a word we have lost sight of in our generation. Dr. Cowen was by all estimations a busy man. He was a practicing physician, a missionary to Africa, and eventually taught medical students. In addition to sitting on lots of boards, being involved in church, and raising four children. Still, he said his family had dinner together every night, at the table, not in front of the TV. And, every morning, he has still, at least two cups of coffee with his wife. My mother has often spoken to me of my parents philosphy when they got married and started to raise us. They lived life making one small good decision at a time. I think Dr. Cowen's life is the result of that. One small good decision at a time.

Ok, this post is already really long, so I'm gonna end with one last thing I've learned from Dr. Cowen. This was not from his conversation, but from a year of quiet observation. Dr. Cowen is a very old fashioned man, with old fashioned values.He is serious about his relationship with Christ and his faith. But, contrary to the way the modern world often views old fashioned values, he loves people with a radical love. Never have I seen him judge anyone. He will treat patients with STD's and addictions. He teaches medical students who live a modern lifestyle and make modern choices. He welcomes young nurses like me. All of us are given the same respect and love. This radical love sometimes comes is hard advice. But, it is love none-the-less. This week I had the pleasure of seeing two long term patients who have been cigarette free for 3 monthes! Thanks Dr. Cowen for your tough love.

So, what do I take from all these rambling? I'm going to make one good choice at a time. I'm going to love people with a radical love. And, despite pretty much all of my hard-wiring, I am going to try not to make plans.

**If any of you want to get the pleasure of meeting Dr. C yourselves, let me know when you are free on a Tuesday or Thursday!